


Nothing

by KelseyJay15



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-05
Updated: 2013-10-05
Packaged: 2017-12-28 11:36:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/991576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KelseyJay15/pseuds/KelseyJay15
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>4000 seconds since he left… 4000 seconds since my heart actually functioned and 4000 seconds since I had a home….</p><p> </p><p>Based on the song "Nothing" by The Script</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nothing

**Author's Note:**

> Well hello there. This is the first story I've ever written for the One Direction fandom. I know the summary is short and very vague but it does reflect the nature of the story pretty well. I really hope you enjoy it and any and all support and/or comments are welcomed always.

"3967......3968......3969....." My foot dangled above the floor as I sprawled my useless body across the sofa. The sounds the clock was making probably would have annoyed anybody else, but to me, it was repetitively soothing. 4000 seconds since he left... 4000 seconds since my heart actually functioned and 4000 seconds since I had a home.... 4000 seconds since my phone was actually quiet as well. The dull buzzing in my pocket being the only thing bringing me back to reality. I lifted my hand from the edge of the couch to reach into my pocket and brought it to my face.

"Hullo?" I muttered, placing my phone in between my shoulder and my ear as my hand flopped apathetically across my eyes.

"Styles! What are you doing! I've been ringing for an hour!" _Nothing much, just watching my world come to a stop in 4000 seconds._

"Nothing." _Liar._

"I'm coming to get you! We're going to the pub! I got Rita and Aimee so let's go!" _Ahh Grimmy. So blissfully ignorant_

"Not really in the mood mate"

"Don't be stupid. Be ready in 10 _" Bye to you too..._ I didn't bother to move my phone. My eyes shifted to the clock, wondering how long I could actually take being lazy until I thought I had to get up. _I'd rather Grimmy not flip the couch.._

With a pained groan I lifted myself to my feet, shoving my phone back into my pocket and letting all the blood painfully rushing to my head. _All the crying._ Slumping to the washroom, I looked at myself in the mirror. Puffy, red eyes. Tear streaks. Bloody, bitten through bottom lip. I cringed _. Look how sexy I am now girls._ Not even bothering to cup the water, I bent my head under the faucet and watched the blood swirl down the sink. Running my teeth painfully over the bite mark, I absentmindedly rubbed my thumb over the top of my left wrist. _I can't change... What a load of shit. You can't do what I do and not be forced to change by people who claim to be doing the best for you._

"If that water is the shower, I WILL pull you out naked!" I rolled my eyes and quickly toweled off the parts of my hair that were wet, shaking my hair around after to put it back in place. I opened the door and slapped my hand over his grinning mouth.

"It was not the shower. It was the faucet." _Not loud enough to be the shower anyways._

"Good! Oy, where's Lou? I had to let myself in." I felt my breath hitch. I know he noticed with the way his hand landed on my shoulder. "Haz? What happened?"

I shook my head and walked past him to grab my jacket. "Don't worry about it." The weight suddenly on my back, brought me to sit on the floor. He quickly sat in front of me, all trace of laughing gone off his face.

"Since when do you lie to me?" _Since I'm trying to forget about it myself._ I sighed harshly and ran my hands roughly through my curls, rubbing my hands down to my eyes where I kept them hidden. "What did he do Harry?"

I laughed lowly and shook my head. "He did exactly what I would have done. He left me because I'm such a fucking slut." _A slut. A slut without someone to love..._

Nick pulled my hands away and grabbed my head. "You are not a slut Harry. It's his loss if he doesn't see how much you fucking love him. You're better off without him anyways." _But I'm best with him._ He gently pulled me up from the floor and handed me my jacket. I reached for my wallet on the desk but he pulled me away. "I got it tonight Styles. You just need some drinks. Then you'll be good. Though no wandering into traffic yeah? I don't need millions of teenagers girls after my arse." I chuckled as I let him pull me out of the flat.

I sat in the back, drifting in and out of conversation as he filled Rita and Aimee on why he was determined on getting me sloshed out of my mind. _Louis doesn't like it when I get too drunk._ I sighed against the window before I noticed their reflections, looking at me with nothing but pity. I turned my head, plastered a grin on my face and leant forward between the seats. "Ey! Let's just go to the regular yeah?" Grimmy nodded and seemed surprised at my sudden turn around. _Maybe some drinks will help me._

Walking towards the pub, I couldn't help but remember every other time before this. Only one common occurrence in all of them: Louis had been there to take care of me, either here or at home. Aimee hit my arm and hissed. "Stop it. You'll drive yourself mental. Just drink and have a good time." _Very supportive Aimee, thank you._ I nodded and followed Rita and Nick to the bar.

Without meaning to, within 30 minutes of being there, I had consumed a couple too many beers. I could see waves in the air, I couldn't stand on my own, and It felt like my mouth was numb. I could vaguely recognize Grimmy laughing beside me as he held me up by acting as a wall, just as I could vaguely recognize Rita's perfectly manicured finger nails lightly pressing into my arm. I lolled my head over to face her and she leaned into my ear. "How are you feeling love?" I tried to give her a thumbs up, it may have come out as just my hand though. She trailed her hand down my arm to hold it as she leaned back in. "We should probably head out though yeah?" I nodded and nudged Nick with my elbow. He turned, looked at Rita and nodded, leading me out by the waist.

 _Louis....Louis....Louis...._ Drinking did not help me forget about him at all. I sighed and squinted when I noticed the flashing lights of cameras, lifting my hand up to shield the light. "Why don't you wankers just take off huh?" Nick always tries to defend me. They kept following us, not deterred in the slightest by Nicks orders.

"Where's Louis?" I muttered. Nick looked down at me, more pity in his eyes. I cleared my throat and tried again. "Where is Louis?" The paps laughed and kept taking their shots. I looked at Aimee. "Aimee... Where is Louis?" She shook her head and grabbed my arm to drag me away. My head shifted back to Nick who was staring at the ground. I stopped. "Nick. Where the fuck is Louis?"

"Harry come on. We can talk about this later, when we're back home." He grabbed my arm.

"NO! WHERE IS LOUIS! I NEED LOUIS!" I backed away from them, Rita reaching for me sadly. I shook her off and kept backing up. "I WANT LOUIS! WHERE IS HE!"

"Harry..." Nick slowly walked towards me. _I'm not a mental case._ "He's gone, Harry. He left remember?"

I groaned in pain and grabbed my head. At least the paparazzi got quite a show. Nick pushed me in his car and Rita sat me up straight, letting me lean my head against her shoulder, combing her fingers through my hair. "Maybe... Maybe if I went to see him... Then I could fix this..."

"Love, you won't be able to fix this. At least not right now. Give him some time." I shook my head. _Louis forgets people so easily... He'll forget me if I give him enough time._

"Take me to Louis" Nick sighed and kept driving. "Nick! Take me to Louis!" Rita smoothed my hair down, shushing me as he kept driving. "Nick please. Take me to Louis!"

Nick turned around a red light. "Harry. You're being ridiculous. I don't even know where he is, and even if I did, I would not take you there. We are going home and you are going to sleep and we will talk in the morning. Stop being such a fucking child" He spun back around as the air turned thick. No one made a sound, or a move or a breath.

I let out a harsh puff of air and I pulled myself out of Rita's arms, ripping the door open, and walking straight to the sidewalk between cars. I could only slightly hear them calling me from the car, but it didn't matter to me. _I need to find Louis. I need to see him. I need to fix this. He'll take me back once he sees me. I know he will._

I could only think of one place that he would go, Doncaster. With a 3 or more hour drive, that had turned into probably a 10 to 12 hour walk ahead of me, I gripped anything I could to help keep me walking straight. I'm sure there will be some nice photos of me drunk and stumbling around tomorrow, but right now, I'm not Harry Styles, singer of One Direction. I'm Curly, Boo Bears boyfriend and best friend, and that's all I need to be. The buzzing in my pocket had once again, grabbed my attention, so I stopped and pulled out my phone to see who it was. _Niall._

I sighed and hit talk. "Hi..."

"Harry! Where the fuck are you? Nick just called me, freaking out, said you jumped out his car and he can't find you!" _Why is he looking?_

"I'm walking." _What else would I be doing?_

"Walking where Harry? He said you were walking the opposite direction of home." _I would hope so._

"To Doncaster."  I heard him suck in a breath. _He knows._ "I'll make it Niall. I will. Eventually I will be there and he will have to take me back."

"He won't Harry. He'll ask why the fuck you were stupid enough to walk and he'll either put you on a bus or he'll drive you back here." _Ouch..._ "Why did you think this was a good idea Haz? What do you honestly think is going to come out of this?"

"He's going to take me back.... He has to... Niall... I hurt..." He sighed and was quiet. I continued to walk, switching my phone to my other hand so I could hold on to the wall beside me.

"I know you do... Can you tell me where you are so I can come get you?" I groaned into the phone.

"You'll come get me and take me home. I need to go to Louis. I will call you when I get there. Love you." And I hung up. I turned my phone off so I wouldn't have to keep dealing with it and stuck it back in my pocket. _12 hours until Louis.... 12 hours..._

**_"Do you know how hard it is to watch you flaunt about every night with a multitude of random skanks?!"_ **

**_"Do YOU know how hard it is to be in the spotlight so much that it makes it look like that?!"_ **

**_"Harry! It's not like they're lying! You go out and make out with skanks every single night while I stay here waiting for my BOYFRIEND!"_ **

**_"Why would you trust them over me?"_ **

**_"BECAUSE THERE ARE PHOTOS YOU TWAT! If you tell me one thing, and a photo tells me another, yes, I am going to believe the photo because I can see it!"_ **

**_"You know I have to go out because of fucking management! I can't stay home with you every night or the fans will know!"_ **

**_"Every night Harry? How about ONCE! That would be nice! But no. You love this double life you get to have. You get me AND the girls. You're the man and you love it."_ **

**_"I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy being able to act a little bit."_ **

**_"It's not even acting anymore! I'm done with this and I'm done with you! We can work together fine, but Louis and Harry are completely over!"_ **

_I'm such an idiot... Such an idiot..._ It started getting colder by the 3 hour mark. I was pleasantly surprised that no one had bothered me. I was well outside London by this point, but Nick didn't come back, Niall didn't come running, and none of the cars driving past, gave two shits that I was walking on the side of the road. It felt kind of nice to be virtually unnoticed. It doesn't happen too often. Though I wish it could be under better circumstances. Not ones that involve me walking half a day to the boy I love in the middle of the night to beg him for another chance.

I slipped my hands into my pocket and grabbed my cell phone, switching it on, and continuing to stumble away from home. 25 missed calls and 56 new text messages ranging from Nick, and Niall, to Liam, Zayn, Gemma, and my Mum. _But not Louis._

I stopped walking and sat down on the ground, leaning myself on a highway sign. I thumbed my way through my contacts, stopping at his name. _Louis. Louis Tomlinson. Louis William Tomlinson. Boo Bear.... Talk._ I brought the phone up to my ear, barely recognizing the buzzing of the cars around me. I could feel my body rocking back and forth. The buzz of the alcohol and the cold working its way through my veins.

"Hello?" My breath hitched. My mind wiped blank. _He answered..._

"Louis..." He didn't reply. I could hear his breath hit the mouth piece so I knew he was still there. "Boo Bear... I'm so sorry.... I'm so so sorry babe and I need you to know that..."

"Harry you're slurring. Are you drinking?" _Always worried about me._

"I was. I know you don't like me drinking, but I had to see if I could help myself.." _That didn't make sense._ "Louis. I love you so much. So much. I'm sorry." I was cold. I leaned down to the ground, my cheek pressed into the dirt, bringing my knees up to my chest. He didn't say anything. "Louis. Please say something. Anything. I need to hear your voice." _Still nothing.. Breathing._ "I took you for granted, and I'm an idiot. But I'm your idiot." I curled in on myself further and my eyes had trouble staying up. I could feel my breathing slow down and my worlds slurring more. "You mean the world to me Lou." My eyes slipped shut. "You make me feel so happy.. So comfortable... So loved.." Louis was crying. I could vaguely tell. "The love of my life Lou... Without you, I got nothing...." The phone dropped. Still heard nothing. Nick found me. Nothing. The boys hugged me. Nothing. Louis kissed me. Nothing. My heart stopped... _Nothing._

 


End file.
